Lencho's 99th birthday party

It was a beautiful day in the bay yesterday. We had a nice, warm, and sunny day. The perfect day for a party. This party in particular was really special because we were celebrating my grandfather's 99th birthday. My mom had been wanting to throw a party for him for the longest time, and she finally went through with it. She planned a great party in just a few weeks. There was mariachi and folkloric dancers and great food. All her hard work really paid off because we all had a great time and for a person that we all love soooooo much.

My grandfather, Lencho, as many of us call him is the BEST grandfather anyone could ask for. He's so beautiful inside and out, and he's really funny too. The love my family feels for this man is sort of indescribable. I won't go into details about how much I love my abuelito, because everyone in my family feels it too, so I'll just say that I had a great time seeing my everyone and I pray that we can celebrate 100!! :)

and special thank you to my hubby for taking a photo of me with my grandfather. It hadn't occurred to me to ask someone to take one, but he did it without even mentioning it. This photo sums up how I feel about my grandfather. When I'm around him I have to kiss him on the cheek at least every other minute. :)

he gives blessings to all of us every time we see him, so here's Ami giving HIM a blessing :)

the oldest member of our family with the newest :)

one of my favorites!

the dreaded "m".

I'm not one to face my fears. I'm not about conquering the world.
I. am. a. coward. A lily-livered scaredy cat. A yellow-bellied chicken.  Okay, I've gone too far with the thesaurus.

Anyway, in pursuit of perfecting my skills, or make myself a better photographer, I've had to convince myself that I need to step out of my comfort zone. I need to put myself in challenging situations.
Um, nu-uh. I don't like it. I don't like challenges. I like the comfort of the "known". I want to be in the safe-zone. I'm a safety-gal. Why, you ask? Because I'm afraid to fail. I do what I'm good at and stick to it. If I step out of that zone and I suck at anything, I give up. I know it's not the best way to go about things but that's who I've been, and that's what I want to change especially when it comes to photography.

Some of you are probably laughing, (at me, not with me) because this seems kind of silly. But it's true. And one of the things that I've been putting off in my self-education is shooting photos in M mode, or manual. The thought alone sends shivers down my spine. Ok stop laughing. Seriously! The fact that I could take control of my camera and control the settings scares me! I wish I could stay in the safe zone, but in order for me to get better I have to get over this fear and just do it. What if I go out there on a paid gig, shoot manually and all the photos come out horrible??? How could I ever show my face in public? BUT I have to try. So I've been practicing, and I know it will take lots of practice but I will get better at it. So, from now on my camera will remain in the dreaded M mode and every photo I post hereon out will be shot manually.

Wish me luck.
:)

Amelie + Maiori, just because.

After work I headed to my mom's place to pick up Ami. I had my camera with me and thought it would be a good idea to practice some more. Ami and my goddaughter/niece, Maiori, were in a dress-up kinda mood so I went with it. I'm pretty pleased with what I got, but as always, I feel I could do so much better. Practice! practice! practice!

Alexis Jo turns 1!

Tak and Danielle are two friends of ours that we really wish we could see more often. We live about an hour and a half away from each other, so when we do get to spend time with them it's always a special time. Yesterday we headed their way to celebrate their little girl's birthday. Now, I've met some really cute babies, but this little one stands in a league of her own. I don't think I've met a happier baby. She is going to be the girl that brings life to any party and warms your heart with her smile. And boy did she have me WORKIN' to get these photos!! At least I got some exercise! (Thanks Lexi!!)

Anyway, I hope you enjoy a few snapshots of this adorable little girl's special day! :)

I'm still here!

It's been a little bit since my last post, and it's really due to the fact that I have nothing new and exciting going on at the moment. I will have some new photos to post after this weekend (I hope). I'm going to a birthday party for a dear friend's baby girl, the big ONE! And she asked me to take some photos. Following this weekend, my mom has planned a birthday party for my beloved grandfather's 99th birthday. So, stay tuned folks, I'll be back! ;)

Margarita's 70th.

I have been best friends with Lupe since day ONE. We were in freshman year of high school when we met.  And we immediately gravitated toward one another the minute our teacher called attendance in a class we took together. "Diaz, Guadalupe?", she called. "here!" I heard someone reply. I was like, whaaaaaaaa??? Then the teacher got to me. "Guitron, Guadalupe?" and as I raised my hand I saw Loop look at me in the same incredulous way. We obviously have a less than common name, so when we heard that there was another "Lupe" out in the world, we were totally baffled. Since then, it's safe to say it was the beginning of a beautiful friendship. Two peas in a pod, yet two totally different souls. And  like the old couple, Mr. and Mrs. Brooks from In Living Color, would say, "we STILL together". We've been through a lot together and we're family. Even when we don't see each other, it's one of those beautiful relationships that picks up right where we left off and she's still my BFF.

So, when Loop mentioned that she was throwing a surprise 70th birthday party for her mom, and hoped I could make it, it was a no brainer. I had to be there. And I had to take photos. It was not an obligation, it was an honor! A lot of work went into pulling off a successful surprise and it all turned out beautifully thanks to all the people involved. To see mom's face light up when all the guests, especially friends she hadn't seen in years, scream "SURPRISE" was the highlight of the night. Her mom is one of the sweetest, warmest, and most lovable women I know and I care for her like my own mom. So, a big  happy birthday goes to Margarita!

the party planners

and their minions...lol

and of course I gotta throw in a pic of me and Lupe :)

just call me "la llorona".

I've always been sensitive. I secretly cry at movies. I say "secretly" because I do everything in my power to hide the tears, the sniffles and the red eyes. I don't like to let my husband see me cry, let alone anyone else. I hate when people see me cry. The only time it's not in my power to control it is when I laugh. Because for strange reason, some genetic defect I suppose, I ALWAYS cry when I laugh. Even if something isn't that funny. I don't know why that happens. Tell me something even remotely funny and the tears pour out. It's like I have some abundance of tears built up inside that they take any outlet they can get. I know. Weird.

It seems like my ability to hide the tears has completely fallen apart since I had my daughter. No one can get me going like she can. She just has to give me the quivering lip and that's it. I'm done. Tears for days. And it doesn't matter who sees. Why is that? People say she has "mamitis" (in English it's the same as "mommy-itis"...lol). Does that mean I have Ami-itis? Is it bad to be just as attached to her as she is to me? Will that make things worse for her in the future? The reason I'm talking about this today is because my daughter is staying with a new sitter, and she had such a hard time when I was getting ready to leave, that I lost it with her. For crying out loud (haha pun intended) I'm supposed to be strong, but I let my guard down. Her new sitter, Mary, is one of the sweetest and loving women I know. She is not only my best friend's sister, but she has TONS of experience with children so it's not like I left her with some stranger that I know nothing about! I've been spending many Fridays with Mary to help Ami get to know her. And it seemed like everything was going great. But today, it was hard. Once I began to say my good-bye's, Ami looked up at me and said "no". Then the tears started to flow. FROM BOTH OF US. I eventually handed her over to Mary, hoping to God that she wouldn't puke all over her from how hard she was crying, and walked out the door. Then I sobbed all the way to work. I felt horrible. I felt like I abandoned her. I hated seeing her face as I walked out the door. Reaching for me with tears, REAL tears, streaming down her face. Man it was tough. I finally pulled myself together and made it in to work. Luckily for me, I work with an amazing group of women who are supportive and consoling, and always open their arms to me. Same goes for them too. We just got it like that. So after talking with them about my morning and taking in all their great advice, I realized I did the right thing. I could have decided to bring her with me to work, but what good would that have done? It would help no one in the end. And I wouldn't have been able to get anything done anyway. :-)

My little one is doing fine now. My best friend sent me text with a photo of Ami sitting on her nephew's lap reading a book, and later sent a video of Ami dancing. So I know she'll be fine. I'm not sure who this was harder on, her or me. All I know is that I'm so looking forward to the end of my day and can't wait to swoop her up in my arms.

P.S. I know this is supposed to be a photography blog, so I promise the next post will have photos. :)